Infertility Story

A lot of you probably know R and I have been experiencing infertility so for those of you interested, here’s our story:
Rob and I were married in April just over three years ago. Obviously I hopped on birth control because there was no way I would have a honey moon baby. My life plan gave us kids in about 5 years so we could really spend some time together as a married couple. We would travel and find ourselves and everything would be perfect 🙌🏼
Plot twist, birth control among a few other factors spiraled me into a very depressed place. I worked part time and the rest of my day was spent in bed with no motivation and so so many tears. R was meeting a very different side of me and I can only imagine what was going through his head. I know he wondered who he had married.
This lasted for about a month when I finally put it together that this was a factor I could remove. We decided I should get off birth control and kind of take a whatever-happens-happens mentality towards kids and pregnancy. It relived stress at the time and was a very good decision for us.
Throughout the next year, my cycle would change. I started skipping two and three months at a time making me jump to the conclusion of pregnancy. After a year and a lot of negative pregnancy tests, I decided to go to my OB for a checkup.
He concluded I had PCOS and R had a low count making it very difficult to conceive.
We tried a couple rounds of chlomid but even when that I couldn’t find my ovulation in my cycle.
Frustrated and feeling like there was little guidance, I just gave up.
Now we’re here sitting in a fertility specialists office and my eyes are welling with tears.
It was really easy to remove the idea of ever being a mom. I told myself I was a mother in different way and that was enough.
Sitting here I’m letting myself feel hopeful for a future I haven’t really considered in a while. ✨